Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Remembering the Fallen, Honoring the Grieving

While Thanksgiving is about appreciation for what you got, Memorial Day is so much deeper. It's appreciation for those who died to give you what you got. ~Doug Koktavy

When I think of Memorial Day and what it means to me, I think of how blessed I am to live in this country, where freedom still rings, even though at times we may take some of our freedoms for granted. I think of the fallen soldiers who paid the ultimate price so that we might continue to live free. I also think of the families, friends, and loved ones of the fallen — the unsung heroes struggling to survive in the face of unspeakable loss. I cannot imagine the depth of their pain. I don’t know how to thank them for their sacrifice except to say that I am deeply grateful, and that I promise to remember them, holding each and every one of them in gentle thought and prayer.

Child Loss: Supporting A Sister In Grief

Only people who are capable of loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow, but this same necessity of loving serves to counteract their grief and heal them.  ~ Leo Tolstoy

A reader writes: My 6 year old niece died suddenly a month ago. She was a completely healthy, strong little girl, until all of a sudden she wasn't. She had been sick for a few days with a low grade fever and a headache. Her parents thought it was just the bug going around. One morning she woke up still complaining of her headache, but asking her parents if she could still go to her cheer competition the upcoming weekend. She was so excited about it. She fell back to sleep. When her father went to wake her an hour or so later, she started seizing. He rushed her to the hospital, where she continued seizing until at one point she stopped breathing and was intubated. She never woke up from that point. Once many tests had been run we were told that she was brain dead and she died from bacterial meningitis.

This Holiday Season and Beyond: I Wish You Enough

Dear Ones,

This story came to me over the Internet a while ago. I've since learned that it was taken from a piece originally written by Bob Perks, and it is reprinted here with his permission. I hope it touches your heart as it does my own:

Recently, I overheard a father and daughter in their last moments together [at a regional airport.] 

They had announced her departure and standing near the security gate, they hugged and he said, "I love you. I wish you enough." 

Understanding and Managing Grief, June 16 - June 22, 2019

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

What is the Treatment for Complicated Grief? http://j.mp/2FqU2DX « Seven Ponds Blog

Grief's New Normal, http://j.mp/2ZzGj5p « Widower's Grief

How a Psychic Medium Broke Through My June Gloom, http://j.mp/2ZGLq3U  « Modern Loss

Caregiving and Hospice, May 6 - May 12, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Meet Daisy, a dog that brings comfort to the dying, http://j.mp/2jShpeA « CTV News

Why Should All Nurses Be Ready to Provide Palliative Care? http://j.mp/2KYoB58 « Palliative Nursing Network

Dying With Dignity: A Look at the Life of a Hospice Nurse, http://j.mp/2KLo1rp « US News

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 22 - October 28, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Loss of a Spouse: 5 Things Only a Widow/er Understands,  http://j.mp/2yZ6SXr « The Grief Toolbox

Trust Me As I Grieve, http://j.mp/2yYFZTM « What's Your Grief ?

Lin Sue Cooney: Coping with grief during holidays, http://j.mp/2yTFOqE « AZ Central

Understanding and Managing Grief, January 3 - January 9, 2016

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Re-Imagining Grief: When Family and Culture Offer No Help, http://j.mp/1mJRDIr « Open to Hope

Mother Loss: What Death Taught Me, http://j.mp/1JwF3ql « HuffPost GPS for the Soul

Ongoing Relationships With Those Who Have Died, http://j.mp/1Rc4wYG « What's Your Grief?

Caregiving and Hospice, November 15 - November 21, 2015

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

On organ donation: Donating Our Love, http://j.mp/1PDeLnZ « Widower's Grief

Does Morphine Hasten Death? http://j.mp/216YH1E « Barbara Karnes, RN

Family Care Complications, http://j.mp/1OSIKsf « The Unprepared Caregiver

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 27 - October 3, 2015

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Family Misunderstanding After A Death, http://j.mp/1jDtVMt « What's Your Grief?

Why Listening Can Be A Gift, http://j.mp/1NYA3dp « HuffPost Quiet Revolution

In Grief: Aversion to Thoughts Of "Acceptance" and "Moving On," http://j.mp/1NWWAr9 « Grief Healing

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In Grief: Family Resists Widow's Readiness to Move Forward


[Reviewed and updated November 13, 2022]

If [one's] character is to be abused, say what you will, there's nobody like a relative to do the business.  ~ William Makepeace Thackeray

A reader writes: I am looking for advice. Almost six years ago my husband of ten years and the father of my children died. The kids were ages 5 and 3 at the time, and now they are 11 and 9. Neither child has any physical memory of their father and almost all of their memories are based on my recollections. I re-partnered three years ago and we began living together in December last year.      
          My extended family members have all found it difficult to accept my new partner. As a result we have little or no contact, which is fine with me. I had always found my relationship with my family members very strained and had little to do with them during our marriage, so letting them go in the end was for me a relief.
          I don't want to end our relationship altogether, but I find it all too much to be reminded continually of my dead husband’s lively personality, along with my parents' insistence on putting him on a pedestal.

Child Loss: Supporting A Sibling In Grief

Find an updated version of this post here:

A reader writes: My 6 year old niece died suddenly a month ago . . . I'm looking for guidance on how to support my sister. She has been completely devastated by this, understandably. 

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 29 - October 12, 2013

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream:

The 4 Letter Word That Leads You Astray (And What to Do About It), http://j.mp/1gzhE5T « Huffington Post

Friday Favorites: Articles about Grief, http://j.mp/19uMLwn  What's Your Grief?

Lou LaGrand: Little Things to Do In Adapting to the Death of Your Loved One, http://j.mp/1attAkP « Ezine Articles

Including Children in Rituals of Grief and Mourning: Special Situations

Source
[Reviewed and updated February 14, 2026]

Previously we've discussed how to explain to your children that a loved one has died, and offered some preparation tips on what to expect at a funeral or memorial service. Of course things don't always go smoothly at a time like this, and when certain situations arise, you may appreciate some additional guidance.

What if your child is reluctant or unwilling to go with you?
It’s been said that families who love together grieve together. Encourage your children to go to the funeral or memorial service. Explain that you are a family, and this is an important family event. Let them know that you expect them to go with you. Say that it is important to you to have them there with you. Ask them to attend for your sake.

Caregiving and Hospice, August 4 - August 10, 2013

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Understanding Pain for Improved Quality of Life, a new tip sheet available from Caring Connections, http://j.mp/11SffNt  « NHPCO

Top 10 Things Palliative Care Clinicians Wished Everyone Knew About Palliative Care, http://j.mp/16zSk9r « Mayo Clinic Proceedings

Lovely! Resting in peace for hospice caregivers and patients, http://j.mp/19SdODC « Caring with Confidence

A New Approach to Finding Help For Family Caregivers, http://j.mp/19gHknc « Caregiving Cafe Blog

Tips for Picking a Healthcare Power of Attorney to Protect End of Life Wishes, http://j.mp/1bbM4aN « Senior Care Corner

Understanding and Managing Grief, May 19 - May 25, 2013

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Is Criticism of DSM-5 'Anti-psychiatry'? huff.to/18bVAf4 « Huffington Post

“Now You’re a Soldier” http://t.co/CN6RyopvGI « FriendGrief

Helpful! When Kids Can't Remember Someone Who Died, http://j.mp/Z5fALk « What's Your Grief?

Bereaved teens face hidden challenges,  http://j.mp/14WtKis « Hospice of the Valley

The impact of grief on you and the family, http://j.mp/133QOuv « Hospice of the Bluegrass

Coping with Pet Loss, March 24 - March 30, 2013

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Free compassion fatigue course for pet professionals, http://ow.ly/jia5P by @NEPetHospice via @hrvethospice

Dealing With the Death of a Pet, http://j.mp/ZrIQHz « Comfort Circle via @eFuneral

Tips on helping kids handle pet loss, http://bit.ly/10EIaDg from @ForeverPets via @TOCKids

Are pets part of your family? http://j.mp/10cJiMl « About.com | Death and Dying

Dealing with guilt and seeking forgiveness after pet loss,http://j.mp/10hedqU  by @MarianneSoucy

"Replacing" A Pet Who Has Died: When Is It Time?

Source
[Reviewed and updated November 9, 2023]

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. ~ C.S. Lewis

A reader writes: I can't believe that it has been almost a year since the passing of our beloved 19 year old cat Mittens. With your help and words of support I was able to cope much better and to this day I still feel the hurt of her loss. I still miss her so much. My wife and daughter want another cat but for some reason I feel as if I can't or I am not ready. I know she can never be replaced and she will always be in my heart. Maybe I am being selfish to my family and to another cat who would have a good home. I have a lot of mixed feelings and not sure what to do. Thank you for listening to me again and God bless you.

Caregiving and Hospice, October 28 - November 3, 2012

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Caregiving and Hospice, October 14 - October 20, 2012

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Caregiving and Hospice, June 3 - June 9, 2012

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week: