Monday, July 4, 2022

In Grief: Death of A Marriage

In every friendship hearts grow and entwine themselves together, so that the two hearts seem to make only one heart with only a common thought. That is why separation is so painful; it is not so much two hearts separating, but one being torn asunder.  ~ Fulton J. Sheen

A reader writes: Two months ago my wife of 5 years came to me out of the blue and asked me for a divorce. To make a long and painful story short, she had been seeing another man and in the time since discovering this I have found out our entire relationship was one lie after another.

Sunday, July 3, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, June 19 - July 2, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Assumptions about the nature of a person's grief based on the type of relationship they shared with the person who died often lead to disenfranchised grieving. What's in a name? Why you can't judge grief by a title « What's Your Grief? 

"I don’t downplay other people’s losses—each is its own unique pain—but the loss of a spouse is perhaps the most world-altering in the day-to-day. It is vast, encompassing every aspect of one’s life." The Infinite Sorrows of Grieving a Spouse « Psychology Today

Monday, June 27, 2022

When Grief Is Delayed and Unresolved

Every difficulty slurred over will be a ghost to disturb your repose later on.     ~ Rabindranath Tagore

A reader writes: I found your Grief Healing websites via Google and I appreciate the wonderful articles and online support group you offer. I'm a man, 44, and through some wonderful recent life experiences I am just now getting in touch with some very old and very deep sadness. It feels like grief but there's no person I'm grieving over; it's the loss of a normal childhood that I'm feeling deep sadness over. Are there grief support groups on the Internet that help guide people in my situation? Thanks very much.

Monday, June 20, 2022

Voices of Experience: Living After My Son's Suicide

On the afternoon of December 23, 2011, Judi Merriam's eighteen-year-old son, Jenson, took his life ~ an act that blindsided everyone who knew him ~ changing her life and those of her family forever. The suicide of a loved one is devastating for those left behind and brings deep despair and seemingly endless grief. Judi was forced to confront profound feelings of loss and guilt and a future so very different from what she thought it would be. In her honest and soul-searching memoir, Empty Shoes by The Door, Judi reflects with grace and courage on the experience of living life after an unfathomable loss.

Sunday, June 19, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, June 12 - June 18, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

While it may be a special day for many, Father's Day is a holiday that challenges the endurance of fatherless children, as well as fathers and grandfathers whose children or grandchildren have died. Father's Day: Insights on Coping with Grief « Grief Healing 

For practical suggestions on how to cope with grief and loss on Father’s Day ~ or on how to better understand and support a father in grief ~ I invite you to read one or more of the articles listed here. Coping with Grief on Father's Day: Selected Resources « Grief Healing

Monday, June 13, 2022

Pet Loss: Guilt Follows Adoption Mistake

Failure is the key to success; each mistake teaches us something.  ~ Morihei Ueshiba

A reader writes: Recently my husband and I bought a beautiful, 3-mo. old Shepherd/Rottweiler puppy. We brought her home and named her Jenny. From the first night it became apparent that we had made a mistake. We were not ready for the demands of a new puppy, nor could we agree on whether to keep her inside or outside (I say inside, my husband said out). We just bought our home, remodeled, and redecorated, and I was a nervous wreck at the thought of the puppy ruining the furniture.

Sunday, June 12, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief & Caregiving, June 5 - June 11, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The loss of a baby is an undeniably singular and terrible loss. And for those who haven’t experienced this type of loss, it can be difficult to know what to say or do or how to help. But social support is one of the ways that humans get through grief, and how you respond to your colleague affects their experience of returning to work and overall well-being. Distilled from the experiences of grieving parents, the author offers ways to best support team members who face this devastating loss.How to Support a Colleague Who Just Lost a Baby « Harvard Business Review

Monday, June 6, 2022

In Grief: Failing to Protect My Mother

Kiss of the sun for pardon. Song of the birds for mirth. You’re closer to God’s heart in a garden than any place else on earth. ~ Dorothy Frances Gurney

A reader writes: I have seen your internet site and found it so interesting. I lost my beautiful mother in 2020 having nursed her at home for ten years. She was wheelchair bound and had dementia but we had a wonderful life together. Sadly I spent alot of time during those years protecting her from Social Services and Continuing Healthcare who were always trying to take her away and put her in a home as the care was cheaper in a nursing home than in her own home and I had to have help from other carers. I was her full-time carer and was on the go all day and many nights at times. I loved caring for her but the endless battle with Social Services left me drained and frightened we would be parted. Social Services tried everything they could to break me down but I had my faith and love to keep me going.

Sunday, June 5, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, May 29 - June 4, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The addition of this new disorder is intended to help clinicians and patients recognize what ‘normal grief’ looks like versus ‘a long-term problem’. Opinion: There is now a disorder for ‘prolonged’ grief. But what does ‘normal’ grief look like? « The Globe and Mail 

Our dying and grieving processes have been disrupted during COVID. The Loss of a 'Good' Death « MedPage Today 

Monday, May 30, 2022

In Grief: A Priceless Gift Goes Unacknowledged

Often you think when you're rejected that you are not good enough, But the truth is they weren't ready for all you have to offer.  ~ Melchor Lim

A reader writes: My friend who died of cancer 14 months ago had been estranged from his family of origin the last year of his life. About 6 weeks before he died, they reached out to him, in the hope of reconciliation. Plans were made for a face-to-face meeting on neutral turf. Unfortunately, my friend began to physically deteriorate, and neither the meeting or the reconciliation took place.

Sunday, May 29, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, May 15 - May 28, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Originally designated as a day “to cherish tenderly the memory of our heroic dead,” Memorial Day is held on the last Monday of May each year. The holiday offers us a great opportunity to recognize and honor the sacrifice of these dedicated service members and their families. Making the Most of Memorial Day « Grief Healing

Monday, May 23, 2022

Voices of Experience: A Promise At Passing

The author at age 2 with her grandmother,
sharing the love of literature 
Author J. Ivanel Johnson shares here the inspiration bestowed upon her by her grandmother through many decades ~ and how a death-bed promise she made to her 30 years ago has finally been kept. She explains how keeping promises made to a passing loved one keeps them close, and may help alleviate any guilt felt at the time of their death.

Monday, May 16, 2022

Pet Loss: Questions from A College Student

The art and science of asking questions is the source of all knowledge.  ~ Thomas Berger

A reader writes: I am a college student who attended one of your in-person pet loss support groups, and I was glad to be there to share feelings with other animal lovers. I grieved over the death of my third dog seven years ago, and I still know how sad I was when I lost him. I am writing a research paper on pet loss for one of my classes, and I’m hoping you’d be willing to provide more information on some questions I’d like to ask you.

Sunday, May 15, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, May 8 - May 14, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

New research identifies key determinants of bereavement intensity. Understanding Grief in the Shadow of COVID-19 « Psychology Today 

If someone you love has died during the novel coronavirus pandemic, you have come to grief in an exceptionally challenging moment in history . . . These and other pandemic-related barriers to the cultural grief rituals we rely on may be making your grief journey especially painful. Ten Freedoms for Using Ceremony During The Pandemic « AfterTalk

Monday, May 9, 2022

In Grief: Is Our Friend Dating Too Soon After His Wife Died?

Love is like a virus. It can happen to anybody at any time.  ~ Maya Angelou

A reader writes: I just read your last post on grief, and I'm wondering: What would you say about this situation? A friend of ours was buried 12 days ago and her widowed spouse came over yesterday to tell us that he has a date this Friday evening. My husband has known this man since high school and we've always considered both him and his wife to be good friends. We acted happy for him, but I thought his dating so soon after the death of his wife to be a little unusual. I’m guessing that you’ll say that this is his way of handling his grief by trying to find someone to fill the empty spot…but, 12 days?!

Sunday, May 8, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, April 24 - May 7, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Like so many institutions and rituals, the funeral business has undergone extraordinary change during the pandemic . . .The lifting of restrictions is allowing more people to attend funerals in person. With restrictions easing, families begin to turn grief into mourning « London Free Press 

Monday, May 2, 2022

Coping with Grief on Mother’s Day: Selected Resources

Source
If I had a single flower for every time I think of you, I could walk forever in my garden.  ~ Claudia Adrienne Grandi

This coming Sunday is Mother’s Day, a day set aside for honoring one’s own mother and for celebrating motherhood. But for those who are mourning the loss of a mother or grandmother, or for mothers who are mourning the loss of a child or grandchild, this can be instead a most difficult day to endure.

If you find yourself or someone you love in these circumstances, know that you are not alone.

For practical suggestions on how to cope with grief on Mother’s Day ~ or on how to better understand and support a mother, daughter, grandmother (or a dad!) in grief ~ you're invited to access one or more of the helpful articles and resources listed here:

Monday, April 25, 2022

Pet Loss: Seeking Support From A Group

A reader writes: Based on your experience facilitating a Pet Loss Support Group, I'm hoping can you answer some questions for an article I am writing. For instance, how important is it for people who have lost a pet to seek help from a support group? What are some of the more common reasons they have for going to a pet loss support group? And how do they usually feel by the time they get to the support group?

Sunday, April 24, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, April 17 - April 23, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Bioethicist Arthur Caplan discusses the tragedy of people dying alone, especially during COVID, and how we should change that. COVID-19: The Sadness of Dying Alone -- What Can We Do? « Medscape

Monday, April 18, 2022

Voices of Experience: Feeling Fate

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in our philosophy.  ~ Hamlet, The Tragedy of Hamlet (First Folio), Act 1, Scene 5

My own suspicion is that the universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we can suppose.  ~ J.B.S. Haldane, scientist

From nearly the start of her fairy-tale romance, Joni Sensel knew she would lose the man whose love changed her life. A dark premonition had warned her. Though she kept this secret in their short time together, upon his death she’s compelled to share it in a letter addressed to his spirit. By sharing the story of her premonition, Joni hopes to encourage others to reflect on their own numinous experiences, and to share them without shame or hesitation. The following excerpt comes from her book, Feeling Fate: A Memoir of Love, Intuition, and Spirit, and is reprinted here with her publisher’s permission.

Sunday, April 17, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, April 10 - April 16, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

“Grief is neither a problem to be solved nor a problem to be overcome. It is a sacred expression of love – a sacred sorrow.”  Grief: Neither a problem to solve nor a problem to overcome « People's Defender 

Alan D. Wolfelt: My Position on the New “Prolonged Grief Disorder” Diagnostic Category in the DSM Grief Is Not a Disorder « Center for Loss & Life Transition

Monday, April 11, 2022

In Grief: Feeling Guilty for Feeling Bad

Don’t compare yourself to others. That’s a battle you can never win. ~ Michelle Parsons

As news about the atrocities in Ukraine continues to flood the airwaves, our hearts go out to the victims, survivors, refugees and others witnessing these horrific events, as well as to the people fighting for their homeland and struggling to survive in that war-torn country. As a nation we express our collective condolences, offer our heartfelt prayers, and work to contribute whatever we can to support them in their cause.

For those of us already struggling with grief, however, such catastrophic events unfortunately can give rise to feeling guilty for feeling bad. Our own individual loss may seem insignificant by comparison, as if we don’t have a legitimate right to mourn.

Sunday, April 10, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, April 3 - April 9, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Many families may feel overwhelmed and bombarded with support in the first couple weeks after a death. In the months to follow, they may feel abandoned and forgotten by their community even though their grief is still very fresh. Exton-Based Nonprofit Offers Tips on How to Support a Grieving Family « Vista.Today

Monday, April 4, 2022

In Grief: Is Anger One of The Stages?

But if she let go of her anger, all that would remain was grief and pain. Anger was easier. Anger could be focused outward. Grief corroded from within.  ~ Robin Hobb

Although anger is commonly identified as one of the so-called Stages of Grief, we now recognize that grief does not occur in easily defined stages, and anger is not always a part of everyone’s experience. Better to think of anger as a state (the circumstances or condition in which you may find yourself at any given time) rather than a stage (one of several sequential phases you may be in, as you work your way toward an end).

Sunday, April 3, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, March 27 - April 2, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

You can't avoid sadness in grief, nor should you try. Allowing yourself to feel and honor your sadness is a way of loving the person you lost. The Nonnegotiable Sadness of Grief « Psychology Today 

If grief is the corollary to love, if grief is love, why set expectations on its pace or texture? Why pathologize love? Opinion: Grief Is Love, Not A Mental Disorder « The Washington Post

Monday, March 28, 2022

In Grief: Confronting One's Own Mortality

Death is a debt to nature due / Which I have paid, and so must you.  ~ Thomas Pynchon

A reader writes: I'm struggling to convince myself that what I'm going through is normal. My Grandma passed away at the end of November. Basically, I walked in to her palliative care room without being told she had already passed away (I expected to see her to say goodbye, tell her I loved her...) The shock of seeing her without being warned or prepared (the nurses said later they 'hoped to catch us' before we went into the room) and my sadness at the loss has had a really big effect on me. In retrospect I'm not sure I would have even gone into the room had I been given the choice. I've never seen a deceased person before - let alone a beloved relative. I've also never experienced the loss of someone close before. I have a really small family.

Sunday, March 27, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, March 20 - March 26, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grief is usually associated with a loss due to death. There are other losses we grieve: loss of a marriage, relationship or friendship, a job, our health, a miscarriage, and loss of function due to aging. These are all extremely personal losses. Omnipresent Grief  « Couple's Net

Let me share with you what I know about grief from dealing with it in others and myself for over 50 years. The most important thing I know is that the measure of grief is the measure of love. The God Squad: How long should grief last? « New Haven Register

Monday, March 21, 2022

Voices of Experience: Helping Children Find the Light

It isn’t easy to accept what we can’t understand. But one thing I know to be true is that light always follows the dark. ~The Wolf’s Curse

We all wish we could protect children from the harsh realities of life, but if it’s one thing the last two years have made clear, it’s that we can’t. What we can do is give kids a safe space to process and name their feelings, and books are often the perfect way to do that. Author Jessica Vitalis reinvents Grim Reaper mythology in her middle grade novel The Wolf’s Curse. The story is narrated by a snarky wolf searching for someone in a highly superstitious fishing village to take her (yes, her!) job. But underneath the fantastical worldbuilding is a story that is honest and accessible; rather than shying away from the difficult emotions experienced by those who are grieving, the author embraces them in a story that opens the door to conversations about grief, tradition, the afterlife, and most importantly, about hope and healing. The following excerpt is reprinted with the author's permission.

Sunday, March 20, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, March 13 - March 19, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

You can't fix a child's grief, but you can walk through it with them.  Dad Next Door: When the unimaginable happens « Seattle's Child 

People with prolonged grief are considered to have intense feelings and preoccupied thoughts that distress them or impede their daily functioning beyond the normal grieving process.  Prolonged Grief Disorder Is Now an Officially Recognized Mental Illness « Gizmodo

Monday, March 14, 2022

Animal Hospice and Palliative Care: Suggested Resources

All we animal lovers ever want is to do the best for our animal. When it comes to dying, what is best can be more complex than euthanizing. There is a way to come to peace with the dying process and discover its life enriching value. Animals can teach us about this if we let them.
~ Ella Bittel

Coping with the terminal illness of a cherished animal companion presents the same challenges to an animal lover as would anticipating of the death any other family member. Today hospice and palliative care for human beings provides a much needed service to the dying and to those who care for them, but finding such support for a beloved animal close to the end of life can be more difficult.

Saturday, March 12, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, March 6 - March 12, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Loss during a pandemic can be complicated, especially when people haven't been able to gather as usual after a death, or to carry on traditions they normally would. Psychologist says pandemic complicates loss and grief « CBC News 

Monday, March 7, 2022

In Grief: Coping with Denial and Disbelief

Denial is only anxiety management.
 ~ Anonymous

Because it is a gradual process of weaning and disconnection, the shock that is felt after the death of a loved one may continue for weeks, months, or even years, in waves of disbelieving aftershocks. “Forgetting” that your loved one is gone, you may find yourself setting an extra place at the dinner table, expecting your beloved to walk in the door at the usual hour or to be on the other end of the line when the telephone rings. And each time it happens, you’re confronted once again with the brutal reality that your special person is forever gone.

Sunday, March 6, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 27 - March 5, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

How much we struggle to keep that which we’re soon to lose. Anticipatory grief is normal and it is borne out of love people have for the person they are grieving. What Is Anticipatory Grief? « Psychology Today.

Monday, February 28, 2022

Death That Brings Relief: Suggested Resources

It is not the load that breaks you down. It’s the way you carry it.  ~ Lena Horne

A reader writes: Hello, I lost my mother last month. She died after a 3 year battle with lung cancer. She also had a stroke a year into her cancer treatments which left her unsteady, unable to drive and with slurred speech. Although she went through Chemo, and two series of Radiation, in addition to 40 days in the hospital for the stroke, she never stopped smoking. This was very frustrating to all of her family, as we were spending most of our time caring for her and taking her to Doctor appointments. It felt as though she didn't care about us. She was also very difficult to deal with, not taking her meds at the right time, over-medicating herself, not eating, not allowing for the care that she desperately needed in the home.

Sunday, February 27, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 20 - February 26, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Talk of death is often avoided around children, unless the loss must be confronted. Approaching the subject, even when necessary, can leave caregivers uncertain about how to address it and what to say.  When a loved one is lost: Working through grief with a child « Columbia Missourian

Monday, February 21, 2022

Voices of Experience: It's Never Too Late to Grieve

A sibling may be the keeper of one’s identity, the only person with the keys to one’s unfettered, more fundamental self. ~ Marian Sandmaier

Judy Lipson says there is no recipe for grief. Her sisters were her compass, constant, champions, and competitors and for thirty years she suppressed the grief of losing her two beloved sisters. Judy lost her younger sister Jane at age 22 in an automobile accident and nine years later her older sister Margie at age 35 to a twenty-year battle with anorexia and bulimia. It was not until 2011 that Judy began her journey to mourn for Margie and Jane, turning tragedy into Celebration through an annual ice-skating fundraiser. The following is taken from Judy's book, Celebration of Sisters: It Is Never Too Late To Grieve, and is reprinted here with her permission.

Sunday, February 20, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 13 - February 19, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The grief of chronic illness extends beyond grief over the loss of our health. We mourn the loss of our place in the world. 4 Losses We Mourn With Chronic Illness « MSN

Monday, February 14, 2022

Helping A Grieving Grandparent

When it seems that our sorrow is too great to be borne, let us think of the great family of the heavy-hearted into which our grief has given us entrance. And inevitably, we will feel about us their arms, their sympathy and their understanding.  ~ Helen Keller

A reader writes: Hello, I’m a grandmother watching her 10 yr old granddaughter suffer through osteosarcoma. I’ve denied the terminal diagnosis, hoping she’ll defy the odds. Hoping and praying for a miracle. I talk to the starry heavens every night, begging. I’m forced to watch my daughter suffer with her daughter’s suffering. I’m crushed and absolutely broken. I’m angry. Why the children …

Sunday, February 13, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 6 - February 12, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Talking to children about death can be challenging. Memorials of Distintion spoke to DR Marianne Trent about how to approach the topic. How to talk to children about death: An Expert Guide « Memorials of Distinction 

Often, individuals with complicated grief reactions were wrongly viewed by health professionals and the general public as weak, too sensitive and needing to buck up and get on with things. Prolonged Grief Disorder « Psychology Today

Monday, February 7, 2022

Pet Loss: Supporting A Teen on the Autism Spectrum through Grief

It is no coincidence that both birds and angels have wings.  ~ Anonymous

A reader writes: My 15 year-old autism spectrum disorder son and his cockatiel were inseparable. Every waking and sometimes sleeping minute his bird was on him or next to him. My son stepped out side yesterday with his cockatiel on his shoulder. His bird flew to the ground just a few feet away and before my son could even take a step a hawk swooped down, grabbed his cockatiel and flew off. With my son's ASD this bird as he put it was his motivation to get out of bed each day. We all are so devastated and concerned for him. I know this only happened yesterday and the shock and pain are fresh but what can we do to not only help him heal but all of us?

Sunday, February 6, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, January 30 - February 5, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

We hold on to love while we can, but sometimes letting someone go is the greatest expression of that love. I'm A Vet Who Helps People Say Goodbye To Their Pets. When My Dog Was Dying, I Couldn't. « HuffPost 

A Brooklyn writer learns to process her grief through her love of art. Welcome to The 'Grief Club' « YouTube

Monday, January 31, 2022

Traumatic Loss: Helping Grieving Grandsons

Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone.  ~ Fred Rogers


A reader writes: My grandsons ages 4 and 7 lost their mom in a tragic single-car accident in which she had been drinking. The night of the accident the babies stayed with a friend of theirs while their mommy went to a friend’s birthday party and when they woke up they had no mom. They were never allowed back in their home, and life as they knew it had simply vanished. The 4-year-old is now 5 and is acting so badly in kindergarten they are talking medication for ADHD—he told us how his mom died and is so-matter-of -fact that you can feel the anger in his voice. A year prior to her death her father (their best friend) died of a heart attack while the younger boy (then age 3) was with him. The 8-year-old acts as the caregiver and basically seems to have shut down. They have had two therapists now and they've both quit on them. Please help. They are so young to experience so much trauma.

Monday, January 24, 2022

Voices of Experience: At Heaven's Door

My lifetime of experiences and my scholarly research suggest that what awaits us at the end of this life is awesome, glorious, and loving, a reminder that there are gifts to be found at every stage of life, including its end.  ~ William J. Peters

In 2000, end-of-life therapist William Peters was volunteering at the Zen Hospice Project in San Francisco when he had an extraordinary experience as he was reading aloud to a patient: he suddenly felt himself floating in midair, completely out of his body. The patient, who was also aloft, looked at him and smiled. The next moment, Peters felt himself return to his body…but the patient never regained consciousness and died. Perplexed and stunned by what had happened, Peters began searching for other people who’d shared similar experiences.

Sunday, January 23, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, January 16 - January 22, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

If you’re wondering how to better support someone during a crisis, or what to say when someone’s grieving, the Circle of Grief may help. Circle of Grief: Supporting In While Complaining Out « Psych Central

Monday, January 17, 2022

Surviving A Sibling’s Overdose Death

Much like suicide grief, there is a complexity in overdose deaths in that people feel like the death was somehow preventable.  ~ Litsa Williams

A reader writes: My sister died unexpectedly from a drug overdose. She'd been off and on drugs since she was 13, but she was one of those very cool, very intelligent, very functional addicts (did I just call my sister an addict?). She got into some trouble last April and moved to live with other family so she could get clean. And--she DID! She was doing great! Had a great job, was enjoying life, it was all good! We had become close again and talked at least once a week.

Sunday, January 16, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, January 9 - January 15, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

What is it that makes young people feel too uncomfortable to talk about grief, and how can we better support them? More than a third of 18–35s are uncomfortable talking about grief, study reveals 

Monday, January 10, 2022

In Grief: Finding Support On A Message Board

A reader writes: I am a university student enrolled in a Theories of Personality course. I am contacting you because you focus on counseling that pertains to grief and loss, and have a message board (of which I could not get beyond 2 posts without reaching for the tissues) as part of your work. I also see that you have been involved with Hospice. I have been on the receiving end of that organization's services a few times and consider the people involved to be damn near angelic. I have no idea whether they realize just how strongly they affect the families that they are involved with.

Sunday, January 9, 2022

Understanding and Managing Grief, January 2 - January 8, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

2021, you showed me that grief is more than just losing someone who died. It’s also about losing people who are still alive. Dear 2021, you taught me a lot about grief « SpokaneFāVS

Monday, January 3, 2022

In Grief: Staying Present in The Face of Inevitable Loss

In order to get from what was to what will be, you have to go through what is.  ~ Unknown

A reader writes: My husband has advanced-stage lung cancer, and I have to face the inevitable that he will die soon. It’s been 8 months; we’ve been married for 20 years. I’m sure that it’s normal, but the thoughts that are running through my head are driving me insane. I keep envisioning myself starting relationships with other men. I feel guilty like I’ve already moved on with my life. It’s survival instinct too, because I can’t support my kids on my own and I’m trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. I love my husband dearly. I want to be focused on the present. How do I do that?