In Grief: When Pet Loss Feels Worse Than Person Loss

[Reviewed and updated March 5, 2024]

Nobody can fully understand the meaning of love unless he's owned a dog. A dog can show you more honest affection with a flick of his tail than a man can gather through a lifetime of handshakes.  ~ Gene Hill

A reader writes:  I am totaly amazed with myself. My beloved dog got taken away very suddenly a week ago, hit and run, and I am a basket case over that. I know pets are not human, but does that make the loss any less? I am so sad I can really die. I know people say get over it he's only a dog, but he wasn't only a dog he was litterally my best friend. My grandfather passed away yesterday, and I feel so confused.

In Grief: Confronting One's Own Mortality

Death is a debt to nature due / Which I have paid, and so must you.  ~ Thomas Pynchon

A reader writes: I'm struggling to convince myself that what I'm going through is normal. My Grandma passed away at the end of November. Basically, I walked in to her palliative care room without being told she had already passed away (I expected to see her to say goodbye, tell her I loved her...) The shock of seeing her without being warned or prepared (the nurses said later they 'hoped to catch us' before we went into the room) and my sadness at the loss has had a really big effect on me. In retrospect I'm not sure I would have even gone into the room had I been given the choice. I've never seen a deceased person before - let alone a beloved relative. I've also never experienced the loss of someone close before. I have a really small family.

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 13 - February 19, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The grief of chronic illness extends beyond grief over the loss of our health. We mourn the loss of our place in the world. 4 Losses We Mourn With Chronic Illness « MSN

In Grief: Am I Making Too Much of My Grandpa's Death?

[Reviewed and updated May 31, 2025]

Young people need something stable to hang on to — a culture connection, a sense of their own past, a hope for their own future. Most of all, they need what grandparents can give them.  ~ Jay Kesler

A reader writes: I lost my grandpa just a few days after his 82nd birthday and I miss him so much. I went to be with him as often as I could and in the last weeks of his life, though it tormented me to see this dignified man, who I more often saw in suits and nice shoes - and now in only in a diaper. The last days of his life seemed to me characterized by only pain and being out of rightful mind. Whether this was due to the beginnings of Alzheimer's or the morphine, I'm not sure.

Hospice, Grief, & Pet Loss, January 19 - January 25, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

This post is for you, Mamaw. Thank you for loving me so well, and for showing me that kindness can change the world. Echoes, https://j.mp/2RIeAgu « Bryan C. Taylor

Depression killed my innately joyful sister. When people ask how she died, this is how I respond. 'Was She Sick?' https://j.mp/30KWHSr « Modern Loss

Face this profound challenge by staying connected and finding friends who will listen. How Men Grieve, https://j.mp/36jY5wt « Next Avenue

Understanding and Managing Grief, May 15 - May 21, 2016

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

What is an Undertaker? Interview with Patrick McNally, Part 1, http://j.mp/25f4w1R « SevenPonds Blog

Coping with loss? Find a New Mirror, http://j.mp/1U5Qd6U « Second Firsts

Laughter and Grief, http://j.mp/1WINZi4 « HuffPost Lifestyle

Teen Grief: Grandparent's Death Triggers Unresolved Grief

Grief: "something thick and gooey inside" 

[Reviewed and updated December 6, 2021]

Grief was like the mud that covered them. Messy. Quickly spreading everywhere, once it found a way in. ~ Veronica Rossi

A reader writes: My grandpa died five months ago. He lived with me for the first nine years of my life after which I moved away. In the past six years plus, I saw him only once for 20 days about a 1.5 years ago. My grandpa was like a parent to me because my parents were working. We had an amazing few years together and he showered all of his love on me. I was his favorite. He was a beautiful man with a great sense of humor and selflessness. He always cared for other people and forgot himself in his worry over and care for others. He was a great soul and I was very, very close to him. But then he got seriously sick at the beginning of school and junior year being very important, I was unable to go see him. I made the choice of going through with my responsibilities instead of visiting him because that's what he would have wanted. He died a few days later and it was very painful for me. But it was even more devastating for my mom, so I wasn't able to talk about my grief with her. 

Understanding and Managing Grief, March 27 - April 2, 2016

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

No One Ever Told Me That Grief Felt so Like Fear, http://j.mp/1pUdKgL « Christina Rasmussen

Updated today: Grief Bibliography, http://bit.ly/9J8Wa4 « Grief Healing

Spousal Loss: What Legacy of Loss Are You Passing on to Others? http://j.mp/1RRkVmH « Open to Hope