In Grief: Helpful Tips on Writing an Obituary

May our obituaries someday say--preferably after we're dead, of course--that we lived in peace, in love, and mostly in grace. ~ Jaime Jo Wright

As noted in an earlier post, an obituary includes both public and private facts that celebrate a person’s life and engagement in the community. 

If you're ever faced with the task of writing and submitting an obituary for publication in a newspaper or online, you may find these suggestions helpful:

In Grief: On Writing An Obituary

Obituaries are just like biographies, only shorter. They remind us that interesting, successful people rarely lead orderly, linear lives. ~ Charles Wheelan

When is the best time to write an obituary?

It is not necessary to wait until a person has died to begin writing an obituary. People can be interviewed before death about what they want included in their obituary – and each of us can begin right now to write our own life story. The obituary may be the only account that will ever be written about us, and this is our chance to tell others exactly what we want them to know and remember about us.  Once written, it can motivate us to continue living an interesting and meaningful life – and inspire us live up to what we’ve written about ourselves. It certainly is a thoughtful gesture that can spare our family and friends from having yet another task to complete (under a newspaper’s deadline) during what will be a sad and difficult time. And it can be a priceless gift to future generations. If you do decide to write your own obituary, make certain that you keep it updated and readily accessible, and let your next of kin know where to find it.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 16 - October 22, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Joanne Cacciatore's Arizona farm is drawing mourning parents from around the globe seeking solace after the loss of a child. Arizona Farm Gives Refuge From Pain, for Man and Beast Alike « U.S.News

Despite going through this turmoil, our society hardly provides the required support to the grieving mothers. Customarily, this issue is considered very trivial in our society and is rarely talked about. Child Loss: A trivialised grief « Minute Mirror

Voices of Experience: Lettering Loss: The Abiding Nature of A Mother's Love

You have to write the book that wants to be written. And if the book will be too difficult for grown-ups, then you write it for children.  ~ Madeleine L'Engle

Sisters Jalyn Scott and Allison Scott Westman have been longing to create a resource for those who have experienced similar circumstances as theirs, and to educate others on the topic of grief and loss, as they continue to navigate the loss of their own mother back in 2013, when the two were only teenagers. On a trip to see their grandmother, they were met with an idea to fulfill this longing, and began writing and illustrating Love, Mom immediately.

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, October 9 - October 15, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

While pathologizing the normal can be harmful, so too can its reverse: We don’t always know for ourselves, or recognize for others, when help is needed. And the science shows that being locked in long-term, unrelenting grief can take a heavy toll. There Are No ‘Five Stages’ of Grief « The Atlantic

Pet Loss: Caring For Your Pet When You Cannot

Forewarned, forearmed; to be prepared is half the victory.  ~ Miguel de Cervantes

When my father died of a heart attack several years ago, my family was totally unprepared. I lived several states away at the time, and in all the confusion, shock and sadness that surrounded his sudden and unexpected death, some decisions were made in haste by other family members, with little or no opportunity for any input from me.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 2 - October 8, 2022

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grief is not exclusive to death; other losses occur more often throughout life. Broadening our understanding of grief and bereavement can help create more inclusive and compassionate communities. Grieving When No One Has Died « Psychology Today