Monday, February 22, 2021

In Grief: When Nobody Seems to Understand

Sometimes all a person wants is an empathetic ear; all he or she needs is to talk it out. Just offering a listening ear and an understanding heart for his or her suffering can be a big comfort.  ~ Roy T. Bennett

A reader writes: Hi! I'm new to this. I lost my father this past fall. The grief and loss that I am feeling is almost unbearable. I am 35 years old. I've been married to my second husband for 2 years. I am at a total loss. My husband doesn't understand nor does he try to. He says that it's something he could get over. He says life goes on. Well, I realize that but it doesn't make it any easier.

Sunday, February 21, 2021

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, February 14 - February 20, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

 A good death is achieved by advocating for, and acting on, what is safest for the pet, what is most meaningful for the caregiver, and what will nourish the veterinary team. The “good death” revolution—Companion animal euthanasia in the modern age « Veterinary Practice News

With time and work, you can feel better—but that doesn’t necessarily happen in the “stages of grief.”  How to Deal With Grief — 6 Tips to Cope With a Painful Loss « Prevention

Monday, February 15, 2021

Pet Loss: Finding Peace After Euthanasia

Not the least hard thing to bear when they go from us, these quiet friends, is that they carry away with them so many years of our own lives.  
~ John Galsworthy

A reader writes: I need help. I am an 87 yr old woman and last year, after a long illness and in and out of hospitals, home, and nursing home, my husband passed away before I could get there even though he asked for me and it was a mere 5 minute trip, he was gone before I got there.

A few days ago I sent my beloved cat to be euthanized. He was my companion for 10 years. I adopted him when he was 7; no one wanted a 7yr old cat and so he was scheduled to be euthanized until I adopted him. He was my good and beautiful friend and helped ease the pain of the loss of my husband. Several months ago he became ill. Our vet tried very hard to care for him but he was declining.

Sunday, February 14, 2021

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 7 - February 13, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Covid-19 has taken more than 100,000 lives in the UK. Restrictions mean that no more than thirty people can go to a funeral. But a funeral is not supposed to be a small, intimate affair, in the way a wedding or baptism can be. Grief, Interrupted « LRB 

For some, the tools they have been using to cope with unprecedented loss and stress are no longer working. Grief and loss of resilience are rising because of Covid-19. What You're Feeling Is Grief « Vox

Monday, February 8, 2021

In Grief: Bombarded with Disasters

You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.   ~ Timber Hawkeye

A reader writes: My only sister, who was 3 years older than me, died two months ago. She was alone in her home at the time, and was not found until three days later. My brother and I live in another state. We had not heard from our sister for a few days and called the police. They went to her home and found her in the hallway. She apparently died from a heart attack. She was 60 years old. We flew to her home town and buried her a week later.

Sunday, February 7, 2021

Caregiving, Grief & Pet Loss, January 31 - February 6, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Whether you’re managing someone who has experienced a loss, or grieving yourself, communication and empathy are key. 7 tips for dealing with grief in the workplace « Fast Company

Monday, February 1, 2021

Praise for Online Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Praise is warming and desirable. But it is an earned thing. It has to be deserved, like a hug from a child.  ~ Phyllis McGinley

A reader writes: I joined your online discussion groups three months after my mother died. I always read the posts from others whose parents had died, but barely responded because there was so much said that I felt I could rarely come up with consolations that may have made an impact. 

Sunday, January 31, 2021

Understanding and Managing Grief: January 24 - January 30, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Toxic positivity is the concept that no matter how difficult a situation, people should maintain a positive outlook. But being positive isn't always the best way forward. It denies people’s emotions. It makes one feel ashamed, and it makes one pile on the guilt, feeling unable to move on.  Toxic Positivity? Say It Ain't so! « Thrive Global 

Monday, January 25, 2021

Coping with Grief In The Second Year

Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling into at night. I miss you like hell.  ~ Edna St. Vincent Millay

A reader writes: How does one deal with the overwhelming grief at 14 months and 9 days....for me it is harder and more painful now. Am I crazy Marty? I have not dreamed of my husband since he went to Heaven, except a nightmare the night he died, that they lost him in the tunnels in the hospital. I can't feel him, no one will say his name and I am trying desperately to understand this all. Does it mean that since I cannot dream or feel him that I did something wrong? I feel that way. My doctor/therapist told me that the second year may be harder and she was so right, am I the only person that feels this way?

Sunday, January 24, 2021

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, January 17 - January 23, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Two weeks ago, my cat unexpectedly passed away. Over the years, she’d become a real-deal dear friend, and in the midst of being isolated during the pandemic, my connection to her only grew stronger. 9 Tips for Grieving the Loss of a Pet During the Pandemic « Well+Good 

You asked why your relationship to your hospice work was affected following the death of your dad. I think because every time you entered a patient's home and life it touched the scar in your heart from your father's death. It rubbed your grief wound.  The Scar In Your Heart: Grief In End of Life Care « BK Books