Childhood Sexual Abuse, Mom’s Murder Complicate A Daughter’s Grief

If there is something to pardon in everything, there is also something to condemn.  ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

A reader writes: My Mom was murdered a year ago. She was poisoned by my father....so not only did I lose my Mom, I lost my father as well... As one could imagine, I am not dealing with reality very well. I have and still am going through counseling on a weekly basis but the pain, rage, and guilt is still very much a part of my daily life.... there have been no arrests by the police... they tell me it is one thing to know he killed her but another thing to prove it..... he fed her fatal doses of anti-freeze over time... she died a very painful death....

In Grief: A Note of Thanks

If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, that will be enough.  ~ Meister Eckhart

A reader writes: I wanted to thank you for your wonderful website. I still have much to learn about grief and how to deal with it. But I thank you because through this website I have been able to connect with other people. It's nice to know that there is a place like this that I can go to when I need encouragement.  And it feels good to know that I am able to support others during their time of need.  ~ A.

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, September 5 - September 11, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Like so many of us, Eleanor vividly recalled the precise moments that rattled and scarred our nation. But unlike the rest of us, she carries a separate grief day in, day out, and not just on the anniversary of the 9-11 tragedies. Mothers do that when they lose a child.  A mother’s never-ending grief « Weirton Daily Times

Pet Loss: Signs of Progress in Grief

You should feel proud of yourself for every small step you make because healing from grief isn’t the result of smoothly navigating a journey. Healing from grief is what happens when you get up each day and decide to keep walking.  ~ Eleanor Haley

A reader writes: Well, it's been a bit over 7 months now and I'd like to say I'm doing wonderfully, but I'm not. I've been feeling pretty terrible and debilitated since my beloved cat died ....despite still DOING things for myself and my future. But I miss my girl more and more each day w/o her and many times still can't even begin to contemplate a world w/o her here.

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, August 29 - September 4, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:  

When my yellow Lab died last spring, I was flattened by an overwhelming sadness that’s with me still. And that’s normal, experts say, because losing a pet is often one of the hardest yet least acknowledged traumas we’ll ever face. How to Grieve for a Very Good Dog « Outside Online

In Grief: “I’ve Lost Everything That Was Normal”

There is something about losing a mother that is permanent and inexpressible—a wound that will never quite heal.  ~ Susan Wiggs

A reader writes: My mom died of cancer 3 months ago, after 7 years of fighting. I am 22 years old and I have lost everything that was normal. I miss my mom so very much, she was my very best friend. I just need someone to talk to that understands. I feel so alone. I am a Christian and that helps a lot but I literally don't have anyone, my dad had to move away, my boyfriend of 3 1/2 years broke up with me 1 week after the funeral and my friends are too into college and partying. I feel like I have been robbed.

Understanding andManaging Grief, August 22 - August 28, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:  

I’m not a horse whisperer, but I have a new understanding of horses and their internal power. It began with Dr. Jo Anne Grace’s gentle voice inviting me to participate in a two-day equine-assisted grief therapy program. Equine-Assisted Grief Therapy: Healing with Horses at Humble Ranch « Steamboat Magazine

In Grief: Anticipating The Death of My Mother

Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation. ~ Rumi 

A reader writes: I am new to this. My mother is dying. She has breast cancer and now only a few months left. I am falling apart watching her die .... slowly .... I don't know how to do it. I fall apart at work, in the car, all the time now. I don't want to eat or smile or do anything. I just want to cry and sleep.

Understanding andManaging Grief, August 15 - August 21, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week: 

Few of us get through life without experiencing grief, but, as a culture, we don't do a great job of talking about it. What you should know about grief after COVID-19 deaths « The Union Democrat

In Grief: Remembering Only The Good

You should never say anything bad about the dead, only good. Joan Crawford is dead. Good.  ~ Bette Davis on the death of Joan Crawford

A reader writes: Recently I read something about finding a balance in one's mind of what was good and what was not so good in a past relationship. The idea was that remembering only the good can make it harder to come to terms with the loss. And they used a term for finding this balance. Marty, are there any articles you could suggest on this topic?