Monday, August 20, 2018

In Grief: "I Think I Killed My Mother"

When we finally come to accept that suffering, impermanence and death are facts of life, we are freed from our unrealistic expectations, our grasping, and our subsequent disappointments and grief.  ~ Christine Longaker

A reader writes: My mother died last December at the age of 94. I have been tortured by thoughts that I didn't do enough to prolong her life. My mother and I were extremely close as my father died when I was 7 and I had no siblings. For the past 20 years, she had lived with my husband and me and our two daughters. She was the girls' caregiver while I worked. 
          My mother was my rock and so devoted to me and my family. I admit I took all that for granted. She moved across country with us 4 years ago when we relocated to a warmer climate. I didn't feel too guilty about uprooting her because all her siblings were gone and our small family was all that she had.

Sunday, August 19, 2018

Understanding and Managing Grief, August 12 - August 18, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

3 Important Tips for Grieving at Work, http://j.mp/2BlN4jQ  « Gary Roe

Heartwarming! The Toymaker, http://j.mp/2OMe5Pw « Bryan C. Taylor

Dude, Where's My Grief? http://j.mp/2OMkwC5 « Modern Loss

Coping with Pet Loss, August 12 - August 18, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

'My dog was looking into my eyes as she died': the grief of losing a pet is real, http://j.mp/2MTB4rd « The Guardian

Pet Loss: Involving Children in the Euthanasia Decision, http://j.mp/2P1SljD « Grief Healing

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Monday, August 13, 2018

Pet Loss: Involving Children in the Euthanasia Decision

As an adult or child, experiencing grief means to 'feel,' not just to 'understand.' Anyone old enough to love is old enough to grieve. Even before children are able to talk, they grieve when someone loved dies. And these feelings about the death become a part of their lives forever. ~ Alan D. Wolfelt

A reader writes: Last month our family dog was diagnosed with terminal bone cancer. Soon after, my husband and I spoke with our now 7-year-old son and 3-year-old daughter about our dog's cancer. We shared that she would not get better from it and that she would go to heaven. Our dog is in increasing, uncontrollable pain now, and I expect we will euthanize her soon. I read an excerpt of yours regarding preparing children for pet loss. You recommend involving the children in the decision of euthanasia and being present when it occurs. Do you recommend this for children that are our kids' ages?

Sunday, August 12, 2018

Caregiving and Hospice, August 5 - August 11, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

When Is The Right Time For Hospice Care? http://j.mp/2KOoTKE « Forbes

Meditation App Benefits Hospice and Palliative Care Clinicians, http://j.mp/2KHZXEw « Oncology Nursing News

Dog with cancer helps hospice director spread the word to keep living after terminal diagnosis, http://j.mp/2MBovk9 « Idaho State Journal

Understanding and Managing Grief, August 5 - August 11, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Do Whatever it Takes to Get Through This, http://j.mp/2KJDnuV « Second Firsts

It's Not Guilt, It's Sadness, http://j.mp/2KFU4rb « Soaring Spirits International

Grief and the Healing Property of Time, http://j.mp/2KHRktu « Pallimed

Monday, August 6, 2018

Voices of Experience: Becoming Starlight

Aristotle taught that stars are made of a different matter than the four earthly elements ~ a quintessence ~ that also happens to be what the human psyche is made of. Which is why man’s spirit corresponds to the stars. Perhaps that’s not a very scientific view, but I do like the idea that there’s a little starlight in each of us.  ~ Lisa Kleypas

Soon after completing her graduate studies in psychology, Dr. Sharon Prentice longed to discover “the why’s” about her own intimate experience with death in the form of a Shared Death Experience (SDE), and that of others who had experienced something “weird, unbelievable, odd” at the time of the death of a loved one.  By sharing her own story, she hopes to replace fear with hope, and take away the vulnerability that is intrinsic in sharing these experiences: "When vulnerability morphs into strength, Starlight wins!" The following excerpt comes from her book, Becoming Starlight: A Shared Death Journey from Darkness to Light, and is reprinted here with her permission.

Sunday, August 5, 2018

Caregiving and Hospice, July 29 - August 4, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Why Me? The Calling to Become an End of Life Doula by Emily Risner, http://j.mp/2KeN703 « Conscious Dying Institute

Ninjutsu for the Hospice Patient, http://j.mp/2uWwm59 « Pallimed

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 29 - August 4, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grief Massage Therapy Sessions Help Clients Cope, http://j.mp/2ODkf57 « The Amateur's Guide To Death and Dying

I (Still) Go To Therapy, http://j.mp/2MhIPqs « Soaring Spirits International

Is Everyone Grieving or Is It Just Me? http://j.mp/2McTpPK « Victoria Noe

Coping with Pet Loss, July 29 - August 4, 2018

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Killer whale holding dead calf afloat is showing human-like grief, expert says, http://j.mp/2LTvs2R « CBC News

End of Life Photo Session with Cooper, http://j.mp/2M2dAQb « Columbus Ohio Pet and Dog Photography

For dying cats and dogs, a last, loving goodbye, http://j.mp/2M4O39a « MPR News

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.