Grief Is Difficult

Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult -- once we truly understand and accept it ~ then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters. ~ M. Scott Peck, MD

A reader writes:  I read in one of your recent posts a quotation from The Road Less Traveled about accepting the fact that life is difficult. I'm trying to understand the author's words but failing.

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, March 19 - March 25, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Grief is a normal emotion, but it can be overwhelming. Coping with death, whether it's the loss of a relative or friend, is vital to mental health. Here are tips for grieving in an effective way.  How to deal with grieving the loss of a loved one « azcentral

Pet Loss: Child Seeks Ways to Cope

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.  ~ Winnie the Pooh

A reader writes: Today my cat Mischief died! She was the best cat in the world! She died with my parents at our house. I am VERY heart-broken! Besides my dogs she was the only friend that would NEVER get mad at me!!! I mean this is a lot for me to go through at the small age of 10! Do you know of any ways for me to cope but never forget the good times we had?

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, March 12 - March 18, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

It happened AGAIN today! If you think it can't happen to you, read the comments (114 and counting!) at the base of this blog post. Please, PLEASE pay attention to your cat or kitten's whereabouts. Losing a beloved animal in such a horrific way leaves pet parents traumatized with gruesome images and devastating feelings of grief, guilt and remorse. Pet Loss: Curious Cats Get Killed in Clothes Dryers « Grief Healing

In Grief: Saying The Wrong Thing at A Funeral

Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.  ~ Benjamin Franklin 

A reader writes: I don't know why I'm so unable to say the right thing at the right time but for some reason I just seem to put my foot into my mouth and make so many ridiculous comments. I decided to go to a funeral of a person I was acquainted with through a church activity group. She died last Sunday and her funeral was yesterday. All I could do was think about my mom and I was crying for the loss of my mom more so than I was crying for the loss of this friend. I felt sadness for her family and could see they were going through the same things that I did when my mom died three months ago.

Understanding and Managing Grief, March 5 - March 11, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The International Day of Hope and Healing after Loss is a free online experience brought to you by the Opento Hope Foundation with the mission of helping people find hope after loss. Open to Hope's International Day of Hope & Healing After Loss « YouTube

Looking for Aswers in Grief

He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

A reader writes: I have never been a religious person. But it seems that when you have such a tragedy in your life like losing a husband of 40 years that you seem to turn that way because you are looking for an answer. All the books that I seem to read talk about the plan that God has in store for you. Why I get so upset is that I was completely happy with my old plan - being with the love of my life until we were, say, 90 years old (not just 60). So why take my wonderful plan away and make me so miserable because He has a plan for me?

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 26 - March 4, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The first step in offering support is to acknowledge that this is their loss, too.“Support doesn’t have to look different for either partner. It just needs to be actively demonstrated,” said Jacqueline Fernando, a California therapist who specializes in infertility and pregnancy loss counseling. How To Support The Non-Pregnant Partner After A Miscarriage « Huff Post

Voices of Experience: Navigating Grief in the Wake of A Husband's Suicide

After taking her sons on a hike with the family dog one beautiful fall afternoon, Charlotte Maya returned home to find a police woman, a policeman, and a priest in her driveway—there to deliver the news of her husband’s suicide. Charlotte knew her husband had been stressed about work, but she had no idea he was suicidal. She thought he had stayed home to take a nap. 

As a young widow, Charlotte cried, cursed, meditated, medicated, downward-dogged, and ran as a way to make sense of her husband’s suicide. As the mother of two bereft sons, she summoned her inner strength and clarity in order to provide steady guidance for them to navigate their own ways through the ensuing months and years. Her story offers intimate moments, powerful lessons, as well as practical ways through which not only suicide survivors but any of us experiencing loss can move forward to live lives of joy and purpose.

Understanding and Managing Grief, February 19 - February 25, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Everyone's grief is different. Good intentions don't necessarily bring good advice. Giving advice can be a subtle route to power. Why You Can Ignore Advice About Grief « Psychology Today