Music for A Pet Loss Service

Music speaks to my soul in a way that mere words cannot . . . Through music the emotions of grief are shared.   ~ Tanya Lord

A reader writes:  Hi, Marty! I am a Music Therapist and I am providing music for a grief pet loss service next month. Do you know of any songs that might be of comfort to people mourning the death of their pet? Maybe you could ask others who are mourning the death of their pet. Thank You for any help you can offer!

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss, October 11 - October 17, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week: 

Pediatric nurse practitioner Deborah Fisher spent her early career working in intensive care units. The experience convinced her that more needed to be done to improve end-of-life care for children. A nurse practitioner’s Brief But Spectacular take on end-of-life care for children « PBS News Hour

When Attending A Funeral Triggers Grief

Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.  ~ Benjamin Franklin 

A reader writes: I don't know why I'm so unable to say the right thing at the right time but for some reason I just seem to put my foot into my mouth and make so many ridiculous comments. I decided to go to a funeral of a person I was acquainted with through a church activity group. She died last Sunday and her funeral was yesterday. All I could do was think about my mom and I was crying for the loss of my mom more so than I was crying for the loss of this friend. I felt sadness for her family and could see they were going through the same things that I did when my mom died three months ago.

Understanding and Managing Grief, October 4 - October 10, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Books can help students feel less alone by showing characters who have experienced something similar. Depending on the content, they can also help students understand complex feelings, explain the facts and permanence of death, or even help students connect with memories of their deceased loved one. Books Are Essential Tools to Help Children Manage Grief « Education Post

Dating A Widow: How Can I Connect with Her Adolescent Daughter?

Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.  ~ Aristotle

A reader writes: I'm not sure how to handle situations that develop between my friend's widow, myself and her kids. Don was my friend for many years. We played football together in high school. I've known his wife Sarah since kindergarten. Don and Sarah met in highschool and were later married. Don passed away two years ago in an accident. Sarah and I have rekindled our friendship and it's grown into a love affair. They had two kids together. Their son is 15 and their daughter is 17. The 17-year-old can't get used to the idea of "someone taking her Dad's place". I don't want to take Don's place. I want my own place in their lives. What can I do to connect with the daughter? How can I let her know it's O.K. to accept me as a friend not a father figure? Will she ever allow her mom to find romance again? Thank you for your thoughts on this.

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 27 - October 3, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Years after the devastating loss of a child, I live a happy, meaningful life once again. Yet the cycle of grief has predictable triggers. The Continuing Cycle of Grief « Alive In Memory

The pandemic is an opportunity to create a new language of mourning. To forge new ritual. How can we honor the dead in the universe of ourselves, of our homes? The Water, the Grief « Los Angeles Review of Books

In Grief: Widower Looking for Coping Skills

To feel alone is to be alone.  ~ Jonathan Safran Foer

A reader writes: My wife passed away in hospice this past month. Since then I went home and had scant support from outside sources, to some degree by choice, and I've done everything mostly alone. Hospice people have called and sent literature, and I just couldn't accept my wife's death enough to respond. I was her caregiver and basically her nurse for years, without alot of outside help, it was all left up to us.

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 20 - September 26, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Fear + anxiety = emotional unrest, which leads immediately to insomnia. The global pandemic has made restful sleep an uphill battle.  COVID Insomnia « Laurie Burrows Grad 

I am pleased to report that both the Grief Healing Blog and the Grief Healing Discussion Groups websites continue to be fully compliant with Health on the Net Foundation’s HONcode. Grief Healing Notified of HONcode Certification! « Grief Healing

Birth Grandparents and The Grief of Adoption Relinquishment

Whenever we allow a child to be adopted we are also saying to the parents of that child that we do not value their parenthood, because we are willing to eliminate their role and to provide their child with a new birth certificate, which allows the false assumption that they as parents did not exist. Most children have grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and often siblings. Adoption denies that those relationships exist. The denial involved in adoption devalues the entire family of origin. This is an insult to the child, to the parents of the child and to all other family members. How could we expect people not to be deeply hurt by such an experience?  ~ Evelyn Robinson, Adoption and Loss -- The Hidden Grief

Understanding and Managing Grief, September 13 - September 19, 2020

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Learn about mourning rituals that validate loss during social isolation in our interview with death doula and activist Michelle Acciavatti. When Funerals Move Online, How Can We Create Mourning Rituals That Truly Validate Loss? « Seven Ponds Blog