In Grief: Learning from Experience

There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience, and that is not learning from experience.  ~Laurence J. Peter

Over a single weekend, a remarkable series of posts appeared in one of the forums on our online Grief Healing Discussion Groups. Entitled What I’ve Learned, it began when one of our widowed members decided to share what she’s learned from grief ~ both positive and negative ~ and she invited others to follow suit.

The result is a remarkable list of helpful tips and insights, all containing the wisdom that only comes from the hard-won, gut-wrenching experience of having lost a loved one. We decided that such wisdom deserves to be shared with others who are grieving.

Take Care in Seeking Comfort and Support in Grief

You need many teachers, not one teacher; you need many gurus, not one guru; you need many books not one book!  ~ Mehmet Murat ildan

A reader writes: One of my recent problems has to to do with a book I’m reading, consisting mainly of writings and 'lectures' by a man who claims to be an actual avatar, a real embodiment of God Itself, and whose claims of how things really are, and how a continuing life might be for anyone, are very, very close to what I already believed to be the most logical and sensible way things probably worked. BUT, a few of the things he says have also been not only different, but quite frightening, at least to me.

In Grief: Finding Comfort in Writings

But words are things, and a small drop of ink, falling like dew upon a thought, produces that which makes thousands, perhaps millions, think.  ~ Lord Byron

A reader writes: We are all on a rough journey, a journey with no map and our companion is not by our side as we know it, but if we move ahead forward at whatever pace we so choose and find comfort in some way we have traveled far...I enjoy seeking these poems/writings as they are indeed comforting and they stimulate your thought process allowing you to really see the light so to speak. 

Having a bumpy ride this week, this has helped....grab a tissue...

In Grief: Use Caution When Seeking Comfort

Find the latest version of this post here:

Take Care in Seeking Comfort and Support in Grief

A reader writes: One of my recent problems has to to do with a book I’m reading, consisting mainly of writings and 'lectures' by a man who claims to be an actual avatar, a real embodiment of God Itself, and whose claims of how things really are, and how a continuing life might be for anyone, are very, very close to what I already believed to be the most logical and sensible way things probably worked. BUT, a few of the things he says have also been not only different, but quite frightening, at least to me.

Voices of Experience: The Wisdom of a 5-Year Old Picking Carrots

Credit: Dylan Parker

By Mary Beth Beck-Henderson

You can bury a lot of troubles digging in the dirt. ~ Anonymous

Mary Beth and her husband John had been married for nearly 24 years before he succumbed to complications of a superior mesenteric artery (SMA) aneurysm on November 22, 2016. They have a son who is now 20 years old and in college. Mary Beth has worked with families as a social worker and family educator for over 26 years. Acknowledging that she is "always looking for ways to make meaning out of all of this," she uses writing as a tool for healing grief, and hopes that the journal she is keeping may become a book one day. The following essay is reprinted here with her permission.

Caregiving and Hospice, January 10 - January 16, 2016

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Physician-assisted suicide is not a failure of palliative care, http://j.mp/1OowLQn « Canadian Family Physician

Navigating Hospice Care with a Reluctant Caregiver, http://j.mp/1P5kUdu « Pallimed

My Right to Die: Assisted Suicide, My Family, and Me, http://j.mp/1OTEwzf « Mother Jones

Caregiving and Hospice, March 8 - March 14, 2015

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Wise words: Before I Go: A Stanford neurosurgeon’s parting wisdom about life and time, http://j.mp/1Bhjcbo « The Washington Post

If only they knew what hospice could do, http://j.mp/1FlE1c2 « PetoskeyNews.com

5 Qualities of Caregiving Excellence, http://j.mp/18H1APl « Alzheimer's Reading Room

Caregiving and Hospice, July 29 - August 4, 2012

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

• SOLACE: Sharing the wisdom of the dying, http://j.mp/PRX3ZS « SevenPonds Blog
  
  
• Must read article on caregiving, http://j.mp/N8xAg6  by Sandra Tsing Loh in @TheAtlantic via @CaregiverSN
  
  
• Important questions here: A Desperate Act, Born of Depression, http://j.mp/M9lNR8 « New York Times
  
  
• Having the Talk - An Important Gift, http://j.mp/M8MkOs « Hospice and Caregiving Blog
  
  
• Easy things you can do to help the hospice patient in your life, http://ow.ly/cFxMg via @SeasonsHospice

Caregiving and Hospice, December 4 - December 10, 2011

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

• Caregiving Confessions: When You Lose Your Temper, bit.ly/rt7XpK from @LeezaGibbons via @Caring
  
  
• Hospice volunteer brings comfort with his music, shebpr.es/uoav1n via @hospicepharmacy
  
  
• Teen describes her role as a hospice volunteer, http://j.mp/ud4H99 via @FlHospicesPC
  
  
• Another wonderful hospice video from 2011 Creative Arts Contesthttp://bit.ly/rDlnD7 MT @NHPCO_news
  
  
• If you wonder what hospice care is, watch this! http://bit.ly/uY6VY2 by @HelptheHospices via @Georgefan67

What I've Learned from Grief

Over a single weekend, a remarkable series of posts appeared in one of the forums on our online Grief Healing Discussion Groups. Entitled What I’ve Learned, it began when one of our widowed members decided to share what she’s learned from grief—both positive and negative—and she invited others to follow suit.

The result is a remarkable list of helpful tips and insights, all containing the wisdom that only comes from the hard-won, gut-wrenching experience of having lost a loved one. We decided that such wisdom deserves to be shared with others who are grieving.  Read on here >>>