Anxiety and Panic Attacks in Grief

Our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strengths.  ~ C.H. Spurgeon

A reader writes: I am trying to figure out if what I am going through is normal. I am thinking that it is probably some kind of panic or anxiety attack. It started when I had something upsetting happen totally unrelated to the death of my friend. Everything went okay with that situation but things seemed to get worse as the evening went on. Yesterday it was like I had tunnel vision all day. I felt shaky and detached. I have been restless, anxious, and feeling like I am sleep deprived when I have actually been sleeping.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 23 - July 29, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

If the results of this study can be replicated and generalized, it seems that we are left with a major public mental health educational challenge. Whether by lack of knowledge or psychological denial, a large swath of the public may be suffering and not resolving grief normally. Recognizing and Reducing Prolonged Grief « Psychiatric Times

Does Hospice Withhold Food and Drink?

Quality is never an accident; it is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, intelligent direction and skillful execution; it represents the wise choice of many alternatives.  ~ William A. Foster

A reader writes: So… both of my in-laws passed away in different hospice facilities at different times in S. California. They received no food or water of any kind, just getting pain medications, and they passed within a week.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 16 - July 22, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

People who are grieving can make us feel uncomfortable. We tend to isolate those who are grieving, exacerbating their pain and loneliness. Acknowledging and addressing each other's suffering goes a long way to alleviating it. We need to be less afraid of saying or doing the "wrong thing" when addressing someone's grief. I'm Sorry For Your Loss « Psychology Today

In Grief: Sharing Sadness with A Child

It [is]our job to walk them through understanding their pain but also to be honest with them about our own.  ~ K.C. Freeman Ray

A reader writes: I recently lost my dad really suddenly, and he was only 50 and very healthy. I just wanted to talk about this because it seems there's nobody to tell. Nursing my younger brother today because he's not well. I got just an overwhelming sadness and couldn't stop crying and its weird how it doesn't even cross his mind why I might be upset because he's young? I dunno I don't get it surely even if he's a child he misses my dad too? Anyway I had to pretend I was crying because I felt ill and he was like "I never cry when I'm ill" haha.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 9 - July 15, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

The bereavement-support organization Judi’s House estimates that more than 450,000 U.S. children will lose a parent to suicide by the time they turn 18. Short sleepaway camps have emerged as a unique way to support children and families grieving these losses.  Bereavement Camps Help Kids Affected by Suicide Grieve « TIME

Pet Loss: Regrets Following Dog's Burial

Bones mend. Regret stays with you forever.  ~ Patrick Rothfuss

A reader writes: I am writing in hopes that you may be able to provide advice or support that I can give my parents who just had to euthanize their 12-year-old Golden Lab, Barney. He had to be put to sleep because he could not walk anymore. It was a very sad event for the whole family, especially for my mother who was home alone a lot with him. Since he was buried last Sunday, my mother has not been able to let go of the fact that neither the vet nor my mom closed Barney’s eyes before he was buried. I know it sounds silly, but it really has been bothering her. She says she still can't control her emotions. Do you have any advice or comfort I can give her so she can let this go? Does this matter that he was buried with his eyes open?

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 2 - July 8, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Public trauma, or vicarious trauma, refers to indirect exposure to a potentially traumatic event. Watching the news, listening to a survivor’s story, or witnessing a tragic event can cause vicarious trauma. When left unaddressed, public trauma can manifest in the psyche, causing PTSD-like symptoms. How to Heal From Public (Vicarious) Trauma « Psychology Today

Grief Support Group: When Is It Time?

The type of group [in person or online] isn't the most important factor in the grief journey. Rather, finding a group that best enables personal growth, healing and moving forward is key.  ~ Anna Baglione, PhD

A reader writes: I lost my husband while I was pregnant with our first child and he was undergoing a bonemarrow transplant for his treatment of lymphoma. I was wondering if anyone around the 6th month maybe (cause thats where I am at now) remembers things more vividly. I had forgotten so many precious things and I don't know if it was the point that I am at but everything comes to me so clearly. I dream more vividly,

Understanding and Managing Grief, June 25 - July 1, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

"Am I mentally ill? I've been told I am manic, a spoiled rotten brat and have dependent personality disorder." In Grief: Emotional Immaturity, or PTSD? « Grief Healing

Clinical experience, empirical evidence, and common sense all point to the oft-noted truism in serious illness and loss that was summarized in my friend Jim Kok’s book, now in its third edition, 90% of Helping is Just Showing Up. "Being There" is Invaluable: The Role of Presence After Loss « Grief Perspectives