When you're happy, you enjoy the music. But, when you're sad, you understand the lyrics. ~ Frank Ocean
People have known for centuries that music touches the human soul. We know intuitively that music affects us in profound and healing ways, both emotionally and physically, and present-day research demonstrates this to be true. In health care settings such as hospitals, clinics and hospices, music therapy is found to be remarkably effective in helping to calm patients, reduce stress, ease muscle tension, promote movement and manage pain.
". . .one of the most beautiful gifts that humans have brought to the earth is music. In great music, the ancient longing of the earth finds a voice . . . Music ministers to the silence and solitude of nature; it is one of the most powerful, immediate, and intimate of sensuous experiences. Music is, perhaps, the art form that brings us closest to the eternal because it changes immediately and irreversibly the way we experience time. When we are listening to beautiful music, we enter into the eternal dimension of time. Transitory, broken linear time fades away, and we come into the circle of belonging within the eternal. The Irish writer Sean O’Faolain said, “In the presence of great music we have no alternative but to live nobly." ~ John O’Donohue, in Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom, pp. 72-73When we are struggling with grief, music can lift us up, take us out of our current mood, and transport us to another time and place. When we cannot find the words, a particular song may express our thoughts and feelings even better than we are able to do. Whether with lyrics or without, music can be used as an escape or a respite from our pain, or as a form of relaxation or meditation while we confront our sorrow. Music helps us to remember the one who died, and it can help to bring a sense of balance, peace and harmony back into our lives, even if only for a moment.
In his informative article, What Is Our Phoenix Song: Using Music to Heal Our Grief, Bereavement Services Manager Vince Corso writes: “No matter your preference for style or composer, music can lend itself to healing the pain of grief. I encourage you to connect with music that can offer you solace and bring you to a place of healing and remembrance.” His article includes many creative ways you can use music in your own grief journey.
The following message was posted by one of our members in the Behaviors in Bereavement Forum on our Grief Healing Discussion Groups website:
". . . I have been listening to music that makes me both happy and sad, because it reminds me of my dad. Some of the lyrics make me cry, and some make me smile. I should probably only share the happy stuff, but no, this site also acknowledges the sad feelings, I feel. So, I don’t mean to make everyone sad, but I wanted to share a song: Enya -- If I Could Be Where You Are."Since this post first appeared, several other members have added links to a number of beautiful songs whose lyrics have touched them in some meaningful way. (Due to copyright claims, you may find that, when you click on the links included below, some of the videos no longer appear on YouTube. If that is the case, try typing the title of the song and the artist into YouTube’s search engine to see if another rendition of the song comes up for you.)
If you’ve found a special song that soothes you or helps you remember your loved one, you are invited to add it to our list in the Comments section below.
- A Living Prayer by Alison Krauss
- A New Hallelujah by Michael Smith
- Address In The Stars, by Caitlin and Will
- I'll Always Be With You (for animal lovers)
- Amazing Grace
- Angels by Robbie Williams
- Answer by Sarah McLachlan
- Anthem by Leonard Cohen
- At Last by Etta James
- Baby of Mine by Alison Krauss (for animal lovers)
- Because You Loved Me by Celine Dion
- Bridge Over Troubled Waters by Simon and Garfunkel
- Bye Bye by Mariah Carey
- Canon in D (Pachelbel's Canon) by Brooklyn Duo
- Children of the Universe by John Denver
- Dancing with The Angels by Monk and Neagle
- Esther by Kenny G
- Everything I Own by Rod Stewart
- Fire and Rain by James Taylor
- For Always by Josh Groban and Lara Fabian
- Freebird by Lynyrd Skynard
- Gentle With Myself by Karen Drucker
- Go Rest High on that Mountain by Vince Gill
- Godspeed, by The Dixie Chicks
- Gone Too Soon by Daughtry
- Goodbye by Lionel Richie
- Have I Told You Lately That I Love You by Rod Stewart
- Healing Bridges by Brian Koenigsknecht
- Heart Headed Home by Scott Parker (Christian)
- Heaven Has A Heart by The Guggenheim Grotto
- Heaven Was Needing a Hero by Jo Dee Messina
- Held by Natalie Grant
- Hello by Evanescence
- Holes in the Floor of Heaven by Billy Kirsch and Steve Wariner
- Homesick by MercyMe
- How Am I Supposed to Live Without You by Michael Bolton
- I Believe by Diamond Rio
- I Can't Believe You're Gone by Sharen Wendy Robertson
- I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing by Aerosmith
- I Don’t Want Anything to Change by Bonnie Rait with Norah Jones
- I Find Your Love
- I Know You by Heart by Eva Cassidy
- I Miss You by Avril Lavigne
- I Want You to Live by George Canyon
- I Will Find You by Love Theme for Last of The Mohicans
- I’ll Be Seeing You by Jimmy Durante
- I’ll Be There by The Escape Club
- I’ll Stand by You by Carrie Underwood
- If by Bread
- If I Only Had The Words by Todd Herzog
- If I Could by Barbra Streisand
- If I Should Love Again by Barry Manilow
- If This Is Goodbye by Mark Knopfler and Emmylou Harris
- If Tomorrow Never Comes by Garth Brooks
- In Abba’s Arms by Tony Falzano
- In the Arms of The Angel by Josh Groban and Sarah McLachlan
- In This Life by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole
- Last Time by Moonlight by Enya
- Let Go, Let God by BC Ramos
- Livin’ Without You by NiagraFalls
- Love Story by Andy Williams
- Lullabye (Goodnight My Angel) by Billy Joel
- Make Me A Channel of Your Peace by Susan Boyle
- Mama by il Divo
- Memory by Barry Manilow
- Morningside by Neil Diamond
- Music to Grieve To via SoundCloud
- My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion
- My Immortal by Evanescence
- Nobody Knows by The Lumineers
- One More Day by Diamond Rio
- Praise You in This Storm by Casting Crowns
- Precious Child by Karen Taylor-Good
- Remember Me by Josh Groban
- Say Goodnight Not Goodbye by Beth Nielson Chapman
- Bring the Rain by Mercy Me
- Saying Goodbye to You by Karina Long
- Show Me Around by Carly Pearce
- Sissy’s song by Alan Jackson
- Smile by Chris Rice
- Smile by Josh Groban
- So Far Away by Carole King
- Softly As I Leave You
- Somewhere Over the Rainbow by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole’s Version
- Somewhere Over the Rainbow by Leona Lewis
- Still by Gerrit
- Stuck on You by Lionel Richie
- Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton
- Thank You by Johnny Reid
- The Dance by Garth Brooks
- The Great Divide by Joe Cocker
- The Living Years by Mike and the Mechanics
- The Old Man by Phil Coulter
- The Twelfth of Never by Johnny Mathis
- These Days by Gregg Allman
- This Is Your Time by Michael W. Smith
- Time by Alan Parsons Project
- To Where You Are by Josh Groban
- Together Forever by Rico J. Puno
- Until We’re Together Again by Tiffany Coburn
- Vincent by Josh Groban
- Warrior: A Song About Loss by Rachel Leycroft
- When I Get Where I’m Going by Brad Paisley
- Where Do I Put Her Memory? by Charlie Pride
- Why by Jasmine Ramport
- Wind Beneath My Wings by Bette Midler
- Wish You Were Here by Mark Wills
- Without You by Mariah Carey
- Yellow by Coldplay
- Yesterday by Paul McCartney
- You Can Let Go by Crystal Shawanda
- You Needed Me by Anne Murray
- You Raise Me Up by Josh Groban
- You’re Still You by Josh Groban
- You're With Me Now by Tony Falzano
Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below. If you’d like Grief Healing Blog updates delivered right to your inbox, you’re cordially invited to subscribe to our weekly Grief Healing Newsletter. Sign up here.
Related:
- 10 Really Sad Pieces of Classical Music by Daniel Ross and Kyle Macdonald
- 19 Most Comforting Songs About Losing Your Dog by Dan Farrant
- 40 Songs About Death, Loss and Grief to Help You Cope by Beth Ann Mayer
- Alive Inside ~ "a joyous cinematic exploration of music's capacity to reawaken our souls and uncover the deepest parts of our humanity. Filmmaker Michael Rossato-Bennett chronicles the astonishing experiences of individuals around the country who have been revitalized through the simple experience of listening to music."
- How Music Helps with Mental Health by Will Tottle
- Michigan songwriter Brian Koenigsknecht’s candid journey of grief through song by John Sinkevics
- Music and Memory Provides Comfort for the Elderly and Dementia Patients via Seven Ponds Blog
- Music Can Help Us Process Feelings of Loss by Katlyn Eriksen
- Music for a Grieving Heart ~ Grief Healing's Pinterest Board
- Music: Helping to Heal Those Who Grieve, by Tony Falzano
- Music That Soothes Me from Members of our Grief Healing Discussion Groups
- Music Therapy Could Help Manage The Pain of Bereavement from The Conversation
- Music to Grieve By by Mark Liebenow
- Sad Songs to Help Weather Grief by Gary Bennett
- Sing to Thrive by Julia Williamson
- The Hidden Power of Sad Songs and Rainy Days with Susan Cain and Min Kym
- Sad Songs Say So Much: 20 SongsThat Help Deal with Grief by Mya Singleton
- Unlocking The Mind With Music
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