In Grief: Coping with Traumatic Loss

[Reviewed and updated November 11, 2024]

Our anxiety does not come from  thinking about the future, but from wanting to control it.  ~ Kahlil Gibran

A reader writes: For the sixth night in a row I can't sleep. Last Monday a friend of mine was killed in a car accident. Her three children were in the car, the nine and eleven year old were perfectly fine, in fact just scratched. Her four year old was severely injured and helicoptered to another hospital. She died the next day. Mother and child were buried together in one casket. She was a friend from the past, but we had parted ways over the years. She still had a close relationship with my sister and my niece and her eleven year old are close friends. This was not a death I would consider very close to me, although close enough to hurt.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 30 - August 5, 2023

Best selections from Grief Healing's X stream this week:

Loss, especially through unexpected events, can disrupt an individual's worldview. Yet, research has proposed that this disruption can lead to the rebuilding one's understanding of the world. During this process, individuals may discover their own strengths, develop a deeper appreciation for the impact of their relationships and gain new spiritual insights. 3 Lifelines To Hold Onto When Grieving The Loss Of A Loved One « Forbes

Understanding and Managing Grief & Pet Loss: March 14 - March 20, 2021

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Following a stroke, it’s normal for both survivors and those who love them to experience grief.  A stroke may cause many losses, including the loss of career, mobility, independence, and confidence. Grief After Stroke « Psychology Today 

These people, whom I affectionately refer to as “my coding friends,” may not know my name or where I live. But that doesn’t mean I’m not incredibly close with some of them. Dealing with Loss in An Online World « The Miami Student

Physical Effects of Grief

There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.  ~ Laurel K. Hamilton

A reader writes: I am a member of your discussion group...it is a supportive place..thank you.

I lost my best friend 11 months ago and am experiencing the "out of sync" feelings in my body. I've had all kinds of bloodwork, because I was worried...I'm healthier than I've ever been..somehow.

So...I'm guessing this is my body's way of grieving...I go to move my arm, leg or any body part and I feel like I'm moving in slow motion or my limbs don't feel like I have precise control over them.

Delayed Grief: When We Don't Take Time to Mourn

[Reviewed and updated February 22, 2024]

You can close your eyes to the things you don’t want to see, but you can’t close your heart to the things you don’t want to feel. ~ Johnny Depp

A reader writes: I don't know what's happening. It has been more than three years since my friend Jane died. We shared a home for over ten years. Both of our parents had died and our siblings were gone also. We were the only family that either of us had. After she died I went right back to work. Really I went back to overwork. Last December I went to Kenya for four months; when I came back I was not working. I started having dreams about Jane. She would go somewhere and I couldn't find her. I would wake up in a panic.

In Grief: Mourning The Loss of A Friend

Source

[Reviewed and updated December 16, 2024]

The bond between friends cannot be broken by chance; no interval of time or space can destroy it. Not even death itself can part true friends.  ~ St. John Cassian

A reader writes: A while ago I lost my good friend in a tragic car accident. We had just talked the day before. I had called him to warn him about the storm warnings we had in our area and he told me he would call me back that evening but I didn’t hear from him. I tried calling him all the next day and into the evening but still did not get him. I thought something was off, but I never dreamed I would be getting the news I would be hearing the following day.

Understanding and Managing Grief, January 24 - January 30, 2016

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

8 Things To Remember When Everything Is Going Wrong, http://j.mp/1nv7dYy « Medical Health News

'Shouldn't You Be Over That by Now?' How to Respond to Judgment on Your Grieving Process http://j.mp/1KI5TH7 « HuffPost Healthy Living

Crazy with Grief, http://j.mp/1Kb7ESc « What to Say When Someone Dies

Caregiving and Hospice, November 22 - November 28, 2015

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Outstanding: Mothering My Dying Friend, http://j.mp/1QIrEgY « The New York Times

Beyond the Bucket List, http://j.mp/1OrPbiF « The Unprepared Caregiver

A Peaceful Reconciliation, http://j.mp/1N75jD1 « Moments of Life

Teen Grief: Mourning The Death of A Friend

Photo credit: Abby Martin

Because children and teens grieve differently than adults, their needs, especially support through the grieving process, are often overlooked. Consequently, children and teens are frequently forgotten, even invalidated, as mourners.  ~ Kirsti A. Dyer, MD, MS

A reader writes: When I was 12 years old, my best friend in the whole world died, one month before her 12th birthday. She was in the swimming pool playing that game—you know, who can hold their breath the longest—she was under but when she came up she inhaled a lot of water. She stood up and went over to the ladder and she was wheezing. She got up to the ladder and fell backwards, but her cousin caught her.

Understanding and Managing Grief, July 21 - July 27, 2013

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Complicated Grief in Older Adults: A Randomized Controlled Trial of Complicated Grief Group Therapy, http://j.mp/1buFj7D « The Gerontologist

Writing with dying children: a teacher's moving story: You Owe Me, http://j.mp/13LRmaY « Michigan Quarterly Review

Types of Grief: Yes, there's more than one, http://j.mp/1bVdfJU « What's Your Grief?

5 reasons why music would great for digital health, http://j.mp/12NHeen « Kevin MD

In grief, touch matters, http://j.mp/164NK4x « Open to Hope