When a Teen Driver Carries the Weight of Guilt After a Fatal Accident

God teach us by Moments, we only know it as Accidents  ~ Dyota Narotama

A reader writes: Two weeks ago my nephew was involved in a terrible auto accident. He was driving at night during a heavy thunderstorm when one of his rear tires blew out. He lost control of his car, skidded off the highway and ended up hitting a tree. His girlfriend was in the passenger seat and did not survive the accident. My nephew is only 17 years old and is not handling this well at all. I am worried about him and don’t know what I can do to help. 

My response: I’m so sorry to learn of the tragic auto accident that took the life of your nephew’s girlfriend. I can only imagine how devastating this has been for you, your nephew, and both families. Auto crashes are among the most sudden and unanticipated of deaths, and that alone can make grieving especially complicated.

It’s very likely that your nephew believes, deep down, that he was somehow responsible for his girlfriend’s death—even though the accident was unintentional.

Caregiving & Grief Tweets, September 1 - September 7, 2019

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Aid in Dying: A Podcast with Lewis Cohen https://j.mp/2ZFyiAh « GeriPal

Facing Loss: When Hope and Grief Co-Exist, https://j.mp/2HO4OFv « What's Your Grief?

A thank you from doctors to nurses, https://j.mp/2HNPzMM « Kevin MD

In Grief: Teen's Driving Results in CADI (Causing Accidental Death or Injury to Another)

A reader writes: Two weeks ago my nephew was involved in a terrible auto accident. He was driving at night during a heavy thunderstorm when one of his rear tires blew out. He lost control of his car, skidded off the highway and ended up hitting a tree. His girlfriend was in the passenger seat and did not survive the accident. My nephew is only 17 years old and is not handling this well at all. I am worried about him and don’t know what I can do to help. Read on here >>>

Understanding and Managing Grief, June 2 - June 8, 2019

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

How Can You Recover Emotionally After Causing Accidental Death or Injury? http://j.mp/2R0bYd1 « Seven Ponds Blog

18 Caregiving Skills I Can Use on Me! http://j.mp/2R02Vc7 « The Artful Caregiver

Creativity in Grief, http://j.mp/2QWAL1v « Grief Dialogues Blog

Understanding and Managing Grief, May 26 - June 1, 2019

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

How Do you Move Forward After Causing Accidental Death Or Injury (CADI)? http://j.mp/2KlfOMr « Seven Ponds Blog

Grief Looks a Lot Like 'Crazy' http://j.mp/2KcKpvS « Modern Loss

Review: Dead to Me Is a Quietly Radical Depiction of Grief’s Emotional Haze, http://j.mp/2Iab7mh « Slant Magazine

Understanding and Managing Grief, April 30 - May 6, 2017

Best selections from Grief Healing's Twitter stream this week:

Sudden Loss: 5 Ways it Differs from Expected Loss, http://bit.ly/2pRHooo « The Grief Toolbox

Digitally Delivered Mental Health – The Revolution Is Here! http://bit.ly/2qMuoQa « Health Journeys

The Bigger Lesson From Facebook’s New Bereavement Leave Policy, http://bit.ly/2pKavtP « Fast Company

In Grief: Causing Accidental Death or Injury (CADI) to Another

[Reviewed and updated January 25, 2026]

Life is an adventure in forgiveness, the writer Norman Cousins once said, but few things come so hard as forgiving oneself.  ~ Todd Leopold

A reader writes: Three weeks ago I hit a pedestrian. Two days later he died. I am up and down, feeling guilt. Sometimes I try to act OK. My husband is very worried about me. I am going to a class on anxiety. It helps me understand what I am experiencing. But are there any online resources that deal with someone dying who is NOT a loved one, but rather actually a complete stranger and the ongoing guilt I feel about this?