Blogs (and Books) for Bereaved Parents

Blogs are becoming increasingly popular and effective as yet another way for the bereaved to process their grief.  Below I've featured four blogs that I think are especially helpful, developed by mothers whose children have died.  (As you can see, some of these bloggers have turned their blog entries into books, or have based their blogs on books they've already written.)

If you've discovered a blog (or book) you would recommend to other bereaved parents, or if you're a parent who's written a blog (or book!) yourself, please feel free to tell us about it in the Comments section beneath this post.
   
I Have No Intention of Saying Goodbye – Offered by bereaved mother and author Sandy Fox, whose 27-year-old daughter Marcy was killed in an automobile accident, this blog is meant "to help bereaved parents move on with their lives."  Sandy’s first publication, I Have No Intention of Saying Goodbye,  lets parents open their hearts and share stories of hope and healing after a child's death.  Her second and most recent book, Creating a New Normal . . . After the Death of a Child, has more than 80 articles on coping techniques to help the bereaved parent, including a huge resource section.
 
Sunshine In a Blue Cup – In the span of 36 months, Diana Doyle  experienced the death of her mother, her sister and her four-year-old daughter.  Today Dee uses her blog “ to write about my everyday comings and goings which I find to be miracles and how my family and friends have become one of my survival tools and give me a reason to smile again . . . I want it to inspire others to realize that you can face any challenge and survive...even become a better person sometimes because of hardship. I want to remind people to look at the joy the little things in life can bring you.”

Gratitude in Grief is a blog journal created by Kelly Buckley to document her journey in the first year of grief following the accidental drowning death of her son Stephen on July 4, 2009. “One thing has helped me breathe, and that is finding at least one little thing to be grateful for each day, in spite of the pain,” says Kelly. She writes in hopes of helping others to find their “one little thing” as well.  Her latest book, Just One Little Thing is an evolution from and a revision of her first book, Gratitude in Grief: Finding Daily Joy and a Life Purpose Following the Death of My Son, which was published early in 2010.

 KOTA: Knowing Ourselves Thru Art Blog – Founded after the death of their son Dakota in 1999 by commercial artists Hawk and Kara LC Jones (aka Mother Henna), KOTA (Knowing Ourselves Through Art) supports bereaved parents and those who care for them after the death of a child, by “exploring the art of healing” –  encouraging the use of art in creative, healing ways.

Your feedback is welcome! Please feel free to leave a comment or a question, or share a tip, a related article or a resource of your own in the Comments section below.
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© by Marty Tousley, RN, MS, FT, DCC

19 comments:

  1. Thank you so much Marty for mentioning my blog. When I found out Savannah was going to die I searched and searched for supportive information from others that had walked the same road. How they coped on a day to day basis...both before and after.

    I think its wonderful that there is so much support and information on the internet now that is free and from people who know, first hand what its like to lose a child and learn to live again in a new and different world.

    Thank you Marty as always for your compassion and valuable help of others that are grieving....I know you are an expert in this area.

    With love
    Diana x

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  2. I lost my son Danny on July 1, 2008 to an overdose. He was 22. In dedication to him I formed The Prayer Registry for parents who have lost children.

    Please see my website http://sheriperl.com and read about The Prayer Registry. This free website service is dedicated to all of the families who have lost children, whatever age that child was when they passed. This site registers the anniversary day of our children's crossing. The members of this online community,the Prayer Team, have the opportunity to honor their child's legacy, connect with other bereaved parents, and participate in world-wide group prayer for every registered loved one on the anniversary day of their passing.

    There is no charge for this service; it is my sincere hope that every bereaved parent who registers a child will join the Prayer Team and be a source of prayer for all of the children on the other side. Each time another child is
    registered, the Prayer Team grows larger and stronger.

    Please email Sheri at theprayerregistry@gmail.com to register your loved one on The Prayer Registry. I need only your child’s full name along with the date that he or she passed to insure that your child receives prayer every year going forward on the anniversary day of his or her passing. Your child’s name will be published on The Prayer Registry calendar and I will upload comments, biographies, or any other information you want to share about your child with our community of bereaved parents. Once registered, you will be a member of the Prayer Team and will receive Prayer Registry reminders one week and one day before the anniversary day of one of our kids.

    Please feel free to email any questions, concerns or feelings that you would like to share. My door is always open. I hope that this site provides some small measure of balm for the wounds of loss. From one bereaved parent to another, I welcome you to my site and offer my support.

    This is one club that none of us would join by choice, but since we find ourselves in this unthinkable place, we stand stronger when we stand side by side.

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  3. Our son Justin Ryker went to Heaven on August 11th just shy of 3 months old, due to SIDS. I am in the process of publishing a book entitled Justin's Jesus in hopes of helping other grieving parents find peace in such a horrible tragedy. In the mean time I have developed a blog in which I post about what I have learned about life from Justin's passing, my good days and bad days, and life as we know it now. Please feel free to visit my blog http://justinsjesus.blogspot.com and keep your eyes open for the release of Justin's Jesus, hopefully coming out prior to his first birthday May 14, 2012. thank you!

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  4. Our son lived five days, and through that experience I learned that people deal with grief in completely different ways. My husband and I had to heal alone, and together as a couple. GONE NEVER FORGOTTEN is my book offering healing words, inspirational poems and Bible verse on how to live after you come home with empty arms. Our Clayton would have been 16 this year. To find out more about my book check out my website www.nataliebright.com

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  5. These are some great book suggestions. I lost my son a year ago and the pain of losing him was unbearable. Since then I have learned to cope and I have found a lot of helpful advice of coping at http://onlineceucredit.com/edu/social-work-ceus-dl. Through the pain of my loss, I have found relief in the fact that I still have the rest of my family.

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  6. My son Matthew died suddenly at the age of 27 while working out west, He was found in the morning by a co-worker; he had died in his sleep. We later discovered that he died from an allergy to morphine. What has helped me the most is having support of family and friends. As well, going to a support group for bereaved mothers saved me during my darkest time. Bereaved Families of Ontario. Today, almost 3 years later, I run weekend retreats for bereaved mothers as I have seen the power in healing through sharing. You can learn more about my retreat offerings on the website where the retreats are held www.lynedochlyceum.com

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  7. It's only been 9 months since my daughter died and every day is difficult. The only thing I know how to do is to try and write my way through it.

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    Replies
    1. Kim, dear, I'm so very sorry for your loss, and I simply cannot imagine the size of the hole your precious daughter's death has left in your heart. We each must do whatever works for us, and clearly for you, writing is one of the most effective tools. I've visited your blog and read your posts, and your writing is wonderful. I hope many other bereaved moms will find you, at WHERESMYKID, http://wheresmykid.wordpress.com

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  8. I've been putting together blogs by bereaved parents as well as websites for bereaved parents:

    http://www.scoop.it/t/grief-and-loss

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  9. As I read the comments of others who have posted here, my heart goes out to each of them. Like many of them, my wife and I have also experienced the grief that follows the loss of a loved one. The loss of our daughter, remains as my biggest hurdle in life. In her struggle to deal with her own personal grief, my wife, Frances, chose to write about it. It was her hope that by doing so, she would be able to help others by sharing her journey with them. It has been nearly 15 years and she has finally been able to finish writing. Watching her go through this process has taught me a lot about love, life and my spiritual connection. Frances has captured it all in her new book. Should the readers of this blog be interested in her journey,I would invite them to visit her authors page for a brief introduction to her book, "Lean Not on Your Understanding," this is the link www.amazon.com/Frances-Hart/e/B008P7Z6CM

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    Replies
    1. Lin, I'm so very sorry to learn of the loss of your beloved daughter Gail. Your wife's book sounds wonderful, and I thank you for letting all of us know about it. ♥

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    2. Marty:

      Thanks for your kind words and thanks for allowing me to post to your blog.

      Lin Hart

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  10. Our sweet baby, Samuel Evan, died April 14th, 2012, just four hours after his birth. He was diagnosed at 15 weeks gestation with a condition called PUV and we were told he would not live. We chose to carry him as long as we could and treasure every moment of his short life. We are so completely heartbroken to be living without him. We will miss and love him for the rest of our lives. His story can be found on my blog, Nothing Without You, at http://imnotingwithoutyou.blogspot.com/

    Thank you for allowing me to share his life.

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    Replies
    1. My dear RaeAnne, I've just visited your blog, I've read your story, and my heart goes out to you and your husband. Please accept my deepest sympathy for the loss of your sweet baby Samuel Evan, and know that I am thinking of you ♥

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  11. I have written a book that has over its seven years of life brought solace to many in bereavement, including Tsunami and Hurricane Katrina survivors. I use it in my work as a hospice volunteer and trainer. Its title is LITTLE WAVE AND OLD SWELL. You can read about the book (and order copies) by visiting www.littlewave.org.

    Jim Ballard

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    Replies
    1. Jim, I've just visited your website and read enough about your book to convince me to order a copy for my own library. Thank you so much for letting us know about this wonderful resource! ♥

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  12. I stumbled (?) onto this site and would like to introduce myself, too! I am "Donna" and I have now been on the grief journey for 30 years, come this Christmas-time. I lost my whole family in a wreck caused by another driver. My husband, son (2yrs. old) and daughter (9 months old) all died instantly and I alone survived.
    I am thankful to Jesus for strengthening me to endure this tragedy. I've started a site for believing bereaved moms at www.bereavedmoms.com where I write topically and, on a daily basis, provide a little lift called "Donna's Daily." Please check the site out and please feel free to leave a comment or two or three! Thank you for your wonderful site. In His Name, Donna

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    1. I am grateful for your very kind comments, Donna, and I am so sorry for your overwhelming losses ~ I simply cannot imagine what you have endured. There are no words . . .
      I visited your site, and I must say that your story is amazing, a real testament to your own faith and resilience, and such an inspiration. Love and blessings to you, my dear, and from my heart to yours, thank you.♥

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  13. Thank you Marty. I tell people that I never would have believed I could have survived the pain before it happened to me...BUT through God's Strength given to us frail mortals, indeed "Nothing is impossible with God!" Math has never been my strongpoint...it is "28" years this Christmas (not 30!)...I was 28 when the accident happened and my daughter that died as a baby would have been "28" this year...mindboggling to me...Thanks for checking out my site!

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